As protests in Libya enter their fourth week, the consensus in diplomatic circles is a sense of disbelief that Libyan President Moammar Gadhafi has not fucking left yet.
Around the world, diplomats spoke openly about Mr. Gadhafi, often in language reserved for WikiLeaks cables, underlining the prevailing opinion that Mr. Gadhafi is behaving like a ginormous dick.
"Moammar Gadhafi is acting like an in-law who's stayed too long and can't take a hint," said the usually reserved Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. "I have no idea why he's still fucking there, other than to be an epic douche."
Even President Barack Obama, renowned for his careful choice of words, seemed to be losing patience with Mr. Gadhafi: "I never thought I'd say this about someone, but Moammar Gadhafi is an even bigger jackass than Kanye."
In a sign that the US may be trying to send a clear message to Mr. Gadhafi, today the State Department dispatched Donald Trump to Libya.
As people once again filled the streets of Tripoli, Fox News said that it could not estimate the crowd size "until we know how many of them are Democrats."
Meanwhile, CNN's Wolf Blitzer said that as the crisis deepens in Egypt, "Stay tuned to CNN for up-to-the-minute reports about Charlie Sheen.".
197 comments:
It does not appear that Mubarak is leaving office. Looks like he'll stay until he "arranges" the next election in September for his son..
The Middle East has some hardline motherfuckin dictators
A handful of Mubarak supporters on horseback and camelback attack the giant mob of anti-government protestors with whips and clubs. Things end about how you'd expect.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110202/ap_on_re_mi_ea/ml_egypt
so...the Pro-Govt. folks come out busting heads, breaking bones, and acting like violent dip shits. Classy.
That happened hours ago, and it was just the first wave. Protesters and Mubarak supporters formed formed lines and tried to push each other out of the square. It went back and forth for a while. Pro-Mubarak supporters seized rooftops and started pelting the protesters with rocks, bricks, and a few molotovs. Police are wearing plainclothes and roaming the area assaulting reporters (including Anderson Cooper) and confiscating cameras. The Army is putting out fires, but not intervening otherwise. It's still going on.
OK First, I want to (again) congratulate doc for another timely brilliant satire. I wondered how he'd spin this, and I wasn't disappointed.
Second, do NOT watch any Egypt footage while stoned.
I haven't really been paying attention to the news lately. What's Egypt?
The government in Egypt has pulled every dirty trick in the world to
move things in their favor.
The thugs are all Mubarak's employees. NONE of the people attacking the protesters are civilian Egyptians.
Sadly, the events in Egypt look strangely similar to riots that erupt in American cities after a major sports victory.
The media treats us like morons. Like this whole "upheaval" in "Egypt" thing, when we already know Moses killed Egypt decades ago.
WTF are the Egyptians upset about, and why aren't they walking the way the Bangles told me they did?
Funny stuff, guy, but the situation over there is totally serious.
Egypt death toll now tops toll for Iran protests, which US and West widely condemned as an atrocity
I bet Egyptians would love for the Sphinx to come to life and kick the living shit out of Mubarak. And send him to a land far, far away.
CNN's Anderson Cooper was attacked on location! Egypt, don't you dare harm a single ivory hair on that beautiful man's head! He belongs to us!
Workers employed by government-owned companies are promised up to a 2-month salary in advance if they join the Pro-Mubarak's. That guy's got a lot of dirty tricks up his sleeve.
Egyptians: Please do not use violence to destroy antiquities. Even the 82-year-old Mubarak mummy in the presidential palace.
Egyptians want what 27% Americans think WE have, a truly democratic Muslim president.
Democracies need to show solidarity with the people in Egypt! Act now in condemning Mubarak. Also the US should STOP all military aid!
From what I can tell, the Military is taking no action, just the police and Mubarak thugs. Mubarak doesn't control the military, or their sympathies are with the people.
Next thing you know, the Tea Party will be heading to Egypt to teach the people how to sit on lawn chairs & complain about the Government.
It's so vital that world understands this is not a divided Egypt. This is the state attacking the people.
Fox News has no idea where Egypt is on a map: http://plixi.com/p/73294801
LOL
Epic!
Blogger Hamdy Kandil confirms this is Mubarak's plan, to divide the Egyptians in order to stay in power.
A news reporter has resigned from Nile News today because she refused to report fake news Mubarak controls everything. He turned on the internet just long enough to send a message out to support him and attack protesters, then he shut it down again. He sure knows how to be a dictator
He should, he's been one for thirty years.
Egyptian Government Web Sites Shut Down by Hackers
http://post.ly/1ZJrB
Awesome!
Remember the Pro-Democracy Protesters have NO weapons other than Stones, trash, sticks and Their Own Courage..
Cops are shooting, beating, trampling, and teargassing protesters, who have to be some brave fucking sumbitches.
Ashamed to think that my country has aided, abetted, and armed yet another ruthless dictator.
Maybe he paid off the military too? The timing seems so suspicious. Didn't this happen in Iran as well? Everyone protests for a few days, they get beaten into silence a few days later and everything goes back to how it was before.
a protester said "We owe it to the Egyptians that died here today to stay - we know that if we leave they will hunt us one by one."
That's fucking scary!
So impressed with the resolute bravery of these protesters. The Risks they are facing For Democracy and freedom are inspiring..
Fox news is not even covering the events in Egypt now. They can't tear themselves away from their anti-Obama agenda.
FOX just had a (supposed) Muslim cleric on Hannity. This is FOX's spin now, Islamic plot. Hannity was blatantly rude, wouldn't let him talk and then (bravely) called him an "evil SOB". Does anybody ever get the suspicion that FOX stages fake theater to get its message out?
No suspicion... it's a fact!
Mubarak's true colors are showing loud and clear. He will attack his own people to stay in power, as well as the international journalists that get in his way. He must be stopped. If he didn't order these attacks, then he must order the army to intervene against anyone harming the peaceful, pro-democracy demonstrators.
Guardian reports that the army will protect dissidents today, may move on #Mubarak tomorrow. http://j.mp/gmbg11
Bruised, full of blood and standing for the dawn prayer in Tahrir Square this morning: http://yfrog.com/hsim3cj
According to Al Jaeezira, the army is moving into a tight circle around Tahrir Square. Their intentions are not known.
AJE reporting (unconfirmed) that Egyptian VP is threatening to resign over violence which he did not know was going to happen
Reuters: 5 dead and 836 injured in Tahrir Square. About 3 hours ago...
Egypt govt funded mouthpiece Al Ahram front page headline "Millions protest in support of Mubarak" Propaganda lies worthy of Fox News.
http://yfrog.com/h07b7ezj
Hey, Hillary Clinton - "shocking" violence would be if my 92 year old grandma killed someone.
Mubarak's regime killing dissidents is normal.
Great blog doc -- made me laugh. But many of these comments are bringing me down. I've seen many photos online that are inspiring, like the ones of Egyptian Christians holding hands making a living protective shield around protesters as they prayed.
Al Jazeera correspondant: This morning there are roughly 4000 pro-democracy demonstrators and 200 mercenaries in Tahrir.
There is an information war underway in Egypt between state television and digital media. Very different pictures.
Perhaps the thuggery & Internet return are connected only in time. Mubarak just realized Egypt's economy depends on the Internet.
Google launches Crisis Response page for Egypt:
http://t.co/fAtv6XQ
Looks like a good site, using phones and proxys to get around Mubarak's internet shut down.
If Mubarak could imprison the whole Egyptian people in Gaza, I bet he would do it.
They're holding prayers for the fallen victims, heartbreaking. It's calm at the moment, plenty of people bandaged, Tahrir is peaceful.
Friend was trying to deliver medical supplies, they smashed his car and he had to turn & run away
__safi__ Where are you, how did you find us?
In Tahrir in Egypt. Ran search for keyword Mubarak and this is one of the sites that appeared. Dr Beechinor blog made me laugh, first laugh I had in weeks!!! Very tense over here.
from a SOAS alum/friend: pro-Mubarak thugs attacking reporters and destroying cameras in Tahrir
God forbid any truth gets out...
Molotov cocktails being thrown at protesters
http://j.mp/gCeUWX
confirmed from hospital: over 35 dead from last nights massacre
CNN: Yasser El Shimi, Egyptian diplomat, resigns from Egyptian embassy in Washington in support of protests.
Did they shut down the Net again? I've received no tweets from inside Egypt - I follow over 30 there - for 45 min.
Looks like we may have lost __safi__ for the time being then.
Al Jazeera (online arab newspaper) is up and running, and Egypt can't stop the news from getting out!
http://english.aljazeera.net/
Wow! That site is amazing!
One sight the Mubarathugs can't keep you from seeing: Demonstrations in front of EVERY Egyptian embassy & consulate worldwide!
Mubarak says he fears chaos if he quits. As opposed to what? LOL
Al Arabiya: Egypt Prime Minister tells Police not to stand in the way of the Friday protests tomorrow
Massive worldwide sit-in at all Egyptian embassies tomorrow!
http://j.mp/ggjt66
Egyptians rally to defend cultural heritage
As petrol bombs fly near the Egyptian Museum, citizens and army mobilize against Mubarak's looters.
http://www.nature.com/news/2011/110203/full/news.2011.72.html?s=news_rss
Jesus! Mubarak needs a CIA bullet between the eyes, NOW
US State Dept. says that hampering investigative journalists and reporters in Egypt may be in preparation for tomorrow's protests.
ABC has compiled a frighteningly long list of threatened/harmed journalists in Egypt:
http://bit.ly/dNlXD5
Damn! I know Mubarak is in his 80's, but is he so senile that he really thinks attacking world journalists is a good way to shut down communication??
I think protesters in the Middle East throw rocks at one another because they can't make snow balls.
New York Times reveals that no one in American intelligence seems to have seen this coming.
http://nyti.ms/WhyPayEm
If a country should desire the high regard of nations, it would do well not to beat and terrify foreign journalists. Just sayin'
Al Jazeera website has been hacked - an attempt to tarnish the network's image and obstruct the coverage of Egypt's protests.
Does the Right understand that the violent demonstrators in Egypt are paid rightist goons? Does Beck still think they're commies?
The 'right' thinks we should keep our noses out of it, we did so well toppling Iraq's dictator right?
I can't believe I'm saying this, but awake and sing (gag) has a point (retch)
I blame Sarah Palin.
I marvel at their stupidity: incite the population against foreigners in a country that depends on tourism? WTF?
the main economic damage to egypt is from Net shutdown and images of violence scaring away tourists
Journalists covering the crisis also became targets -- beaten, bloodied, harassed and detained by men, most all in some way aligned with Mubarak.
Numerous news outlets -- including the BBC, ABC News, Fox News, the Washington Post and CNN -- reported members of their staffs had either been attacked or arrested. Amnesty International and Human Rights Watch also reported that staffers were detained.
New York Times columnist Nicholas D. Kristof said he feared an even broader crackdown.
"Why doesn't the government want us around? What is it that it plans to do in the next few days that it really doesn't want cameras to be able to report on?" Kristof asked on CNN's "Situation Room."
http://www.cnn.com/2011/WORLD/africa/02/04/egypt.protests/index.html?hpt=T1#\
I can't be the only one getting fed up about the sheer amount of reporting being done by all news agencies across the world, I know this is important, but seriously, when there's an actual development, feel free to tell us then, until then they'll just riot and fight each other, WE GET THE MESSAGE.
I don't think you get just how big an effect this is having on WORLD politics and economics.
Get used to it. We live in the age of a 24 hour news cycle. I would much rather hear over coverage of important events like this than hear one minute of a story of how drunk Snooki got. If you don't like it CHANGE THE CHANNEL, and leave doc's blog the fuck alone.
Hear hear!
Anderson Cooper (CNN): "Got roughed up by thugs in pro-mubarak crowd..punched and kicked repeatedly. Had to escape. Safe now.I'm sore and head hurts but fine. Neil and mary anne are bruised but ok too. Thanks"
ABC News' Brian Hartman: "Just escaped after being carjacked at a checkpoint and driven to a compound where men surrounded the car and threatened to behead us ... One man who swore to kill us wore police uniform. Mubarak banner over the scene. But anger at perceived media bias was genuine."
Katie Couric (CBS): "Outside square Pro Mubarak protesters very hostile...wouldn't let us shoot video, pushing etc another photog just got punched and maced ... It is pretty scary and unruly out there, but we're being very cautious."
Al-Jazeera's Dan Nolan: "2 sides faced off for 15mins, no violence just war of chants then kaboom! Don't know what exactly ignited it but boy did it turn ugly fast! ... Sorry for the radio silence guys but situation has become much worse in past 24hrs esp for media even more so for aljazeera!"
Independent Television News' Jonathan Rugman: "Morning from Cairo! Thugs we think are Mubarak secret police threatening journalists. Many turned back for safety ... One journalist punched in face, another stabbed in leg by pro-Mubarak thugs in Cairo this morning. On their way to hospital now ... Gunfire as anti Mubarak protesters push beyond their barricades ... Chant going up "the regime must come down" ... What I have not described is the constant chanting, shouting, beating of metal barricades - all night and all day."
Al-Jazeera's Anna-Lisa Fuglesang: "So I'm in what people are calling a war zone, journos with bandages on their heads. I on the other hand have got an eye infection ... Monday we were out filming freely talking to people on the streets. The atmosphere was good. Today we can't leave our hotel .. All the journos sitting in the hotel lobby have been moved away from the entrance. Rocks are being thrown close to the front door."
Christiane Amanpour (ABC): "Tried filming on bridge into sq. Mob surrounded us, chased us into car shouting that they hate America - kicked in doors & broke windshield ... In the pre-dawn hours, there was heavy shooting into the protesters & into that square, where women & children also had been all night."
BBC's Jon Williams: "Security situation in Cairo deteriorating. One BBC team detained by Presidential Guard, others roughed up by protesters. Tempers fraying..."
Either a bunch of people who REALLY love Mubarak just decided to start accounts or the regime is now pushing Twitter propaganda. That's why the internet's back up. Mubarak wants to control all communication, like all dictators do, even Twitter. Good luck with that, asshole.
White House comment line is 202 456-1111. This will be one of the most climactic moments of foreign policy this decade. The White House knows they hold significant leverage over the regime, so don't be soothed by the false prophets of humility and futility. The question is what will our leverage be used for. Are we angling simply for a renewed military regime, or are we trying to get the democracy activists and journalists released, a necessary precursor of that free and fair election that Obama and Clinton say they're pursuing. If you believe they are, a call telling them to keep it up couldn't hurt. If you believe they may be moving in other directions, tell them you'll hold them accountable. But let them know we do have an interest, and indeed that we care, about democracy in Egypt.
Good morning kids, some people are so disconnected from the current events surrounding them it makes me want to puke! 'Egypt? What's going on there?'
Sarah Palin is studying hard, she's one letter closer to knowing how to spell 'Egypt'
BBC's Jon Leyne: "The Egyptian army is now willing to support the anti-Mubarak protesters" (bbc.co.uk)
Message to the Egyptians:
Dear Rioters, please do not destroy the pyramids, we will not rebuild them --The Jews
Good one LOL
Egyptians to Mubarak: "So, like, do you need us to call you a cab or something?"
In Egypt, one of the big issues is the right to bear rocks.
Attacks on journalists in Egypt are chilling reminders that journalists are generally soft and squishy.
Mubarak: if you can be defeated by rebels whose only powers are Facebook and Twitter, you deserve to lose your empire.
Tomorrow (Sat), demonstrations to support the Egyptian people taking place starting noon in London, Paris, Rome, Seville and Caracas.
Breaking news from the Middle East: 10,000 Egyptian troops have entered Jordan. She has said she is a little sore but can still walk.
Yo, Egypt, imma let you finish, but the Bolsheviks had the best revolution of all time!
I think 'Kanye' is adlib LOL
Ya got me. Thought it'd be funnier if I signed as Kanye. Egyptian people are a riot. Heh.
I liked it better when I thought everyone in Egypt lived in pyramids.
So who's winning, Egypt or the other guys?
I remain concerned that without Internet access, the people of Egypt may not know that Charlie Sheen is okay.
Egypt's PM says he hasn't had a dialogue with any of the youth as Egypt's state TV claimed. Mubarak liars are getting caught in their lies.
Egyptians, even though we're making jokes, just know that what you're doing is incredible. The world is proud of you.
Thanks. It means a lot. And your jokes are funny :)
Awesome, __safi__ !!
FREEDOM LOADING ███████████████████░ 99% [ Error : Please remove Mubarak and try again ! ]
Egyptian state TV reports a 'terrorist attack' on oil pipeline... how'd they know so fast? Because Mubarak thugs were the terrorists!
Yeah, the news says the gas pipeline to Israel was attacked in northern Sinai
It's also worth noting that the contract to export gas to Israel is ruled illegal by the Egyptian supreme court.
Regime in Egypt still spewing lies, they lied that Suleman vp survived assassination attempt, they bombed Sinai pipeline to blame protestors, evil fucking regime.
This Arish Sinai pipeline explosion is so lame - scare tactic - same trick played during Iran elections.
Was there actually an assassination on Suleiman, and, if so, why is it only a story on Fox and the Indian press?
Ive been watching this for a few weeks now, when it started with Tunisia. I find the idea of revolution refreshing, and Ive been practically glued to Al Jazeera in English.
What I don't understand is why the United States is trying to dictate who should take over after Mubarak leaves. I know there's political ties, etc, but why can't the US government leave the Egyptian people and its political uprising alone?
I dunno, if we can set Mubarak up with a nice little Italian villa, a pension, some bodyguards, all in exchange for him on the next chartered flight out of Cairo, I think we will have avoided some bloodshed.
The US having a hand in diplomacy can be a good thing: Especially if we help Egypt to democracy without invading them. And it would certainly show a change in U.S. foreign policy.
To be sure, brokering Mubarak's graceful exit stage left costs a crapload less than a war of convenience over fake pretexts, so I'm okay with this kinda policing.
If we'd done it with Saddam we'd probably have a bit more debt ceiling left.
I know there's political ties, etc, but why can't the US government leave the Egyptian people and its political uprising alone?
Because we have been paying Mubarak, and will pay his successor, many millions of dollars not to start WWIII with Israel.
A haiku:
Is that a baboon
Throwing feces at justice?
No! It's Mubarak
I understand that the stability of Egypt is important because of the Suez. What I don't understand is why we supported Mubarak in the first place. Simply for stability in the region, similar to the way we supported Saddam Hussein for many years?
the US shouldn't be anywhere near this situation.
Whoa. I agree with you again. I need to change.
Don't worry, awake and barf; it will take a lot more than violent street demonstrations to bring democracy to the USA.
Israel and the US have excellent relations with the Egyptian army in general and Omar Suleiman in particular (assuming he hasn't been assassinated as commented earlier).
The only thing worse than the rule of a tyrant is the tyranny of the mob. Egypt has a once-in-a generation opportunity here. Fuck it up and all they do is exchange one tyrant for a shiny new demagogue who will eventually turn into an unpopular tyrant. Do it right and they could be the pattern for other Arab states to follow and maybe in about 20 years or so, the words "stable, democratic middle east" wouldn't provoke side-splitting laughter.
Basically, the US cares more about its interests than the principle of democracy. Because if Egypt TRULY looks out for itself and takes care of its citizens, policies might be passed that sacrifice America's interests.
And Pres Obama's hair gets whiter and whiter...
The US isn't going to sit back. They only have one shot to salvage anything and that is to get Mubarak to step down as quickly as possible so Omar Suleiman can slide right in. That is why Mubarak tapped him as the new VP. He is our go-to guy for all things nasty in Egypt. He personally oversaw the rendition program in Egypt and has direct contacts in the CIA etc.
The longer Mubarak stays in power now the greater the chance that the street turns on ALL things Mubarak including Omar Suleiman. The US does not want that to happen. If it does it will essentially cut the direct US influence we have enjoyed in Egypt.
And one other point about America staying out of it etc. I really don't think Egyptian protesters are carrying English protest signs for the benefit of their people. They are doing if for the West and the US in particular. So in a way they are at the very least asking for us to side with them and or want our influence on their behalf.
Combine that with the fact that the reporters and Americans are being attacked by the pro-Mubarak guys, NOT the pro-democracy supporters...
This is the US's time to *shine.*
I agree. If we can broker a peaceful transition, make security guarantees for the new elections, basically make it look like all we're there to do is to grease the skids, we can come out of this smelling like roses. It would help to fumigate the stink of Iraq over by the Persian Gulf.
I hate, I absolutely hate, that we have to get involved... But I don't know if we have much of a choice.
It sucks that we're so entangled out there, but we're knee deep in this shit, and we have to deal with that. No one's going to get any rest until Mubarak's out, and Egypt being in such a state of unrest is jeopardizing everything out there.
The Middle East is one big, steamy mess. And while I wish we could drop it like it's hot, we really have a responsibility to clean the mess we made.
If we pull out of Iraq we leave them wide open for Iran to come in and take over, and if we leave Afghanistan we leave it vulnerable to Taliban rule again, which puts us back at square one there.
With all of that business going on, we really can't afford to get pulled into another conflict out there... But we won't have a choice whether or not to get involved if Palestine and Israel can't keep a lid on it, and we're really going to have a much harder time of keeping that shit under control if we don't have Egypt as a secure boarder.
Concerned that Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak did not receive his message to begin a peaceful transition to democratic reforms, President Barack Obama said today that he would resend the message “but this time in all CAPS.”
Mr. Obama said that while he hoped sending a capitalized version of the message would be effective, “we have a variety of other options at our disposal, including resending it in bold.”
In the days since it became clear that Mr. Mubarak did not receive the White House’s initial message, Mr. Obama has been huddling with advisers to discuss a range of more drastic options, including changing the message’s font altogether.
“We are fully prepared to go to a stronger font if that will help make our point to Mubarak,” said one aide who spoke on condition of anonymity. “Right now every font is on the table except Comic Sans.”
On the Republican side, former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin said that she would refrain from commenting on the situation in Egypt until she learned how to pronounce “Mubarak.”
Meanwhile, at the National Prayer Breakfast, Speaker of the House John Boehner (R-Ohio) led all Americans in praying that they never need healthcare.
Yay! A mini-blog! Good on ya, doc.
Doc's the man.
Doesn't he know he'll need the power of all caps AND comic sans to get his point across!? What do they teach in president training anyway?
Obviously Papyrus is the leading choice. It worked for Pandora.
Dude, the Egyptians invented Papyrus, they aren't going to be impressed by it. Quick! Someone send him this.
I think Bodoni works nicely.
GOP Supports a Nice, Clean Helvetica
A true small-government conservative sends emails in plain ASCII and leaves decisions about the fonts to the email client.
He just threatened to send a message in all CAPS and BOLD !! Holy fuck, please anything but not BOLD CAPS, OMFG WE ARE DOOMED!
do not give that man the idea of using 24pt sized fonts!! Fortheloveof!justdont!
I think it's called "President School"
It's true about the Egypt gasline explosion. It was massive, affects supplies to Israel and Jordon:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/41435638/ns/world_news-mideastn_africa
This wasn't terrorism.
This was clearly sabotage by the Mubarak Dictatorship to generate a False Flag reason to impose martial law.
He knows that he has no support domestically or internationally.
He also knows that his doppelganger "vice president" is a CIA stooge that embraces extreme renditions and will not further democracy in Egypt.
Mubarak is desperate to hang onto his power as a dictator. According to the article:
"The company that supplies Egyptian gas to Israel is East Mediterranean Gas (EMG), and one of the major shareholders in the company is Mubarak associate and former Egyptian intelligence chief Hussein Salem."
So Mubarak's former intelligence chief is a major stockholder and has the needed "connections" to pull this off. Mubarak went from a middle class officer to a multi-billionaire (~ 70 billion, a lot gleaned from those billions we American taxpayers have bribed him with to play nice with Israel). He has enough "extra cash" to make it worth Hussein Salem's investment. Perhaps a mix of money and political clout ... or perhaps just downright bribery and a threat to make him a scapegoat in the eyes of the people if he didn't go "with the flow" on this attempt to strangle hold his reign on absolute power in Egypt.
Apparently Mubarak wants to do his own coup on the Egyptian government to eradicate any chance of freedom and establish himself as the current day Egyptian Pharaoh to guarantee his son's succession without a fake election or approval of the military, secret police, or his political party which so ironically abuses the word Democratic in it (almost by spitting on it by using it to ensure democracy is never achieved).
Sigh
People, get out your rusty bicycles. It looks like higher gas prices are coming.
I think the butler did it, using a pipewrench in the library.
Interesting photo: protesters in Egypt charging their mobile phones. http://yfrog.com/h4qeebnj
Sure the protest in Egypt is bad, but imagine how bad it would be in the US if George W. Bush was President for 30 years!
After he steps down as President of Egypt, Mubarak will probably focus more on his Hip-Hop career.
In a desperate move to boost his popularity, Egypt's president has changed his name to Mubarak Muobama.
Awesome, dude! Kudos.
To show support for Egypt, I will be protesting sobriety all day by getting high.
I hope it helps.
If you've been wondering why no one's done a joke about how Mubarak rhymes with Subaru, it's because you suck at rhyming.
lol
President Obama has called on both sides for a definitive secession of power and smooth transition to assure that Brett Favre stays retired.
For the past 3 days Palestinians have been feeding Egyptian soldiers isolated on Gaza border since the Egyptian revolt
http://t.co/GwNxLe0
Egypt was forced to shut down their gas lines. Now their economy is hanging by a thread.
LA Times: "The French prime minister's office has confirmed that France has suspended sales of arms and tear gas to Egypt." (Egypt meaning Mubarak and his thugs)
Sorry, Egypt and Haiti. God's gonna be pretty busy helping the rich athletes of his choice score touchdowns tomorrow. He'll be back Monday.
lmfao
Newly discovered Egyptian hieroglyphics reveal that King Tut suffered from severe flatulence, and was often teased and called King Toot.
LMFAO!!
Hand to God, actual transcript of Palin's take on Egypt:
“And nobody yet has, nobody yet has explained to the American public what they know, and surely they know more than the rest of us know who it is who will be taking the place of Mubarak and no, not, not real enthused about what it is that that’s being done on a national level and from D.C. in regards to understanding all the situation there in Egypt. And, in these areas that are so volatile right now, because obviously it’s not just Egypt but the other countries too where we are seeing uprisings, we know that now more than ever, we need strength and sound mind there in the White House. We need to know what it is that America stands for so we know who it is that America will stand with. And, we do not have all that information yet.”
http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/02/05/palin-criticizes-obama-on-egypt/?smid=tw-thecaucus
Palin's take on Egypt is nonsensical. The less she says off script, the better.
I am surprised Sarah Trademark shot off her mouth about Egypt. She's probably still trying to find it on a map. It's whar those pointy rocks are dadgumit.
Sarah Trademark?
Palin's applying to trademark her last name.
http://bit.ly/gD5WBo
That's OK, we'll just officially refer to her as the Attention-hungry Alaskan Idiot.
Palin's definitely a troll, I say we ignore her and get back to what's going on in Egypt.
You mean that popular uprising in a Muslim country unseating a despot? What could possible go wrong?
"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win." - Gandhi
Egyptian police use Facebook and Twitter to track down protesters' names before 'rounding them up'
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1354096/Egypt-protests-Police-use-Facebook-Twitter-track-protesters.html#ixzz1D9eHr55h
Fuck!
Martyr Sunday
Christian Mass at 2pm in Tahrir Square - Muslims will protect Christians as they pray, just as Christians protected Musims as they prayed.
Fearing own social unrest, China blocks 'Egypt' on networking site and restricts coverage in all other media.
http://www.dw-world.de/dw/article/0,,14817788,00.html
These totalitarian dictatorships are afraid of contagion.
The best protest signs in Egypt:
http://news.icanhascheezburger.com/2011/02/02/political-pictures-best-egyptian-protest-signs/
From the "Unclear on the Concept" Department, Egyptian President Mubarak dissolves Cabinet, will appoint new one
Same driver, different cart?
Reinstate the Pharaoh!!!!
Down with pants!!!!
Mubarak never got around to building a pyramid. He had 30 years!
but no Jews.
Mubarak is in de Nile
Up with skirts!!!!
"The horse is dead and we tried beating it, but it just won't go. Perhaps we should switch saddles? That seems to be the best solution." - H. Mubarak
CAIRO - In what may prove to be the journalistic coup of the year, WikiLeaks today revealed details of the severance package of soon-to-be-deposed Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak.
According to the documents made available by WikiLeaks, upon leaving office Mr. Mubarak will receive $40 billion but will not be allowed to serve as dictator of another country for six months.
Additionally, once he departs Egypt Mr. Mubarak will be transferred immediately to the Pyramid on the Vegas strip.
As for his future plans, the documents reveal, Mr. Mubarak is open to doing anything "except the Piers Morgan show."
Dude! Way to sneak one in before comments close. Hilarious, doc!
I hear Mubarak will take over for Letterman in two years.
"Anyone hiring? I'm experienced in running autocracies, suppressing freedom, crushing dissent, money laundering and, ah ... Farmville."
-- Hosni Mubarak
"If the situation here continues to erode, I'll pull out the big guns: I have a copy of Barack Obama's birth certificate. He's Egyptian." - Mubarak
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